Excuse me!

Brad K brings up some interesting questions about three words used in a variety of ways:

So, what is the choice, between “Excuse me” and “Pardon me”?

I am looking for an alternative to a phrase I keep misusing, “I’m sorry, but . . .”.  The part that bothers me is that I use this phrase even when I have been offended and am not sorry about interrupting or contradicting . . er .. someone.

excuse (verb) early 13c., “to clear (someone) from blame,” from O.Fr. escuser, from L. excusare “release from a charge,” from ex- “out, away” + causa “accusation, legal action”

NOTE: the s in the verb excuse is pronounced with the /z/ sound [ĭk-skyūz']. The s in the noun excuse is pronounced with the /s/ sound [(ĭk-skyūs'].

pardon (verb) to refrain from exacting due punishment from someone

sorry (adjective) Pained at heart; distressed, sad; full of grief or sorrow.

All three terms are used with various meanings in different contexts, but in polite conversation they have the weakened sense of expressing a courteous apology for some minor social offense. Excuse me and pardon me are uttered for offenses that range from jostling someone to belching. They are also used when addressing a stranger, or when one hasn’t understood something and wants it repeated.

I’m sorry can express mere sympathy or apology. Like the other two expressions, it can also be used to introduce a contradiction: I’m sorry, but I can’t agree that cats don’t show affection.

I’ve recently developed an aversion to the use of “Excuse me!” spoken belligerently in the sense of “How dare you say what you just said?” A character in a TV drama I was watching the other night said the expression numerous times in response to remarks that he found insulting. It quickly became tiresome.

The Online Etymology Dictionary offers this information about the three words:

Excuse me: use as a mild apology or statement of polite disagreement is from c.1600

Pardon: weaker sense of “excuse for a minor fault” is attested from 1540s.

Sorry: Apologetic sense (short for “I’m sorry”) is attested from 1834; phrase “sorry about that” popularized 1960s by U.S. TV show Get Smart.

The overuse of “I’m sorry” as a form of self-effacement is not a good thing. But, like the “dear” in Dear Sir, these words don’t have to signify an emotional or truthful engagement with the person addressed. They are “lubrication words” like please and thank you–polite words that grease the wheels of social interaction.

3 Common Latin Expressions

Not too many generations ago, any child privileged enough to attend school beyond the age of seven or so studied Latin. A vestige of what was once a universal educational practice can be found in the use of these three Latin terms used by English speakers:

mea culpa
in memoriam
R.I.P.

I’ve seen mea culpa misspelled as “mia culpa,” and in memoriam misspelled as “in memorium.” As for R.I.P. seen in cartoon drawings of tombstones and on Halloween-related decorations, many speakers are unaware that the initials R.I.P. stand for a Latin phrase.

mea culpa [mā'ə kool'pə]:”my fault.” The expression is part of a prayer of repentance, but it is often used in a secular context to mean “it’s my fault.” I know a classics professor who likes to translate it as “my bad!” If you feel really guilty, you can say, “Mea culpa, mea culpa, mea MAXima culpa!” The misspelling “mia” probably results from saying /mee-uh/ instead of /may-uh/.

The Latin word culpa, “crime, fault, blame,” is at the root of several English words: culpable, culpability, culprit, exculpate, and exculpatory.

in memoriam: “in memory of.” Tennyson named his long poem to the memory of his friend Hallam In Memoriam.

English words from Latin memor, “mindful, remembering,” include: memory, memorable, immemorable (“not worth remembering”), immemorial (“ancient beyond memory”), memorize, commemorate, and commemoration.

R.I.P., the initial letters of the Latin phrase Requiescat in pace: “may he/she rest in peace.” As it happens, the English translation “Rest in peace” gives the same initial letters of the Latin original.

Latin requies, “rest, repose,” gives us the word requiem, Capitalized, a Requiem is a “Mass for the repose of the soul of the dead.” A generalized sense of requiem is any formal tribute to a departed soul.

English words that derive from the same Latin source as requiem are quiet, quiescent, quiescence, and inquiet.

Kiss Anyone, Just Not the Gunner’s Daughter

“A kiss is just a pleasant reminder that two heads are better than one.” – Unknown

Kissing is a very ancient and widely spread means of greeting and showing affection. Kissing conjures up sweet images of romantic embraces or familial love.

One imagines kissing a loved one, a child, a family member. Yet apparently, according to these often forgotten, helpful phrases, kissing a book, some dust, or even the foot of a small woodland creature can have a much deeper meaning.

For example, a ‘kiss-behind-the-garden-gate’ is a country name for a pansy.

If you ‘kiss the place to make it well,’ you are referring to the old custom of sucking the poison out of a wound.

If you are ‘kissing the dust,’ you are completely overwhelmed or humiliated.

While ‘kissing hands’ seems fairly straight forward, it harkens back to the tradition of kissing the hand of a sovereign or a saint’s statue. If the statue was placed too high to kiss directly, people would kiss their own hands and wave it in towards the saint.

On a less romantic note, ‘kissing the gunner’s daughter’ meant being flogged aboard a ship. Soldiers who were to be flogged were tied to the cannon’s breech. While there is perhaps less flogging going on these days, the phrase can still refer to a stiff punishment.

And finally, if you ‘kiss a hare’s foot’ then you are late. You have missed your appointment and the hare hopped by, leaving its footprint for you to see.

While one should perhaps steer away from getting flogged, these other colloquialisms might just come in handy.

“Because Of” and “Due To”

The saying “too many cooks spoil the broth” is spot on in the case of English language. Today, even native speakers make blunders in written and spoken English, being influenced by current trends. One such trend we are talking about is the misuse of “due to” and “because of.”

Many are of the opinion that both of the pairs refer to the same thing, and that they can be used as synonyms. This is an absolute misconception. They cannot be used interchangeably because they do not belong to the same classification. When the classification is not the same, how can the usage be?

Some native English speakers also claim that a sentence cannot be started with the pair “because of.” However, they are unable to demonstrate the reasons. In some cases, the sentence cannot be started with “because of” whereas in some cases it can.

This is the sole purpose of this post. We will be discussing the legitimate reasons, usage and rules associated with both the word pairs.

The Classification of The Word Groups

In order to get a clear understanding of how to use both the word groups it is imperative to first know their classifications.

“Due to” is an adjective, which means it can only modify pronouns and nouns according to the purest English grammar rules.

“Because of” is an adverb, which means it can only modify verbs, adjectives and clauses, but not nouns and pronouns.

The Explanation

It is quite difficult to grasp the concept outrightly with just categorizing the two word groups. So, it is important to lay down a little explanation along with some examples for you to get a clearer idea. Here are some examples of the usage of both the word groups:

His frustration was due to the mucked up windscreen.
He was frustrated due to the mucked up windscreen.

In general, both of the sentences may sound right to you, but they are not. Carefully look at the first sentence and apply the grammar rule of noun modification. The word “his” is a possessive noun and it is complementing the noun “frustration,” and “was” is there as a linking verb. Now, “due to the mucked up windscreen” itself is an adjectival prepositional phrase which is the complement or the reason being attached to the noun with the help of the linking verb “was.” Therefore, in this case the usage of “due to” is absolutely right because it is fulfilling the purpose of modifying the noun.

Now, take a look at the second and apply the same rule there. The pair “due to” is not connecting nor complementing the noun because the possessive noun “his” has been changed to “he,” which is a pronoun. This way, “he” is not the possessive noun now has become the main subject of the sentence and a pronoun.

The pair “due to” has nothing to modify here because the verb is now “was frustrated” and adjectives cannot modify verbs. Henceforth, to connect a reason or a compliment to this sentence the adverb “because of” should be attached with the reason to make it appropriate. The correct sentence would be:

He was frustrated because of the mucked up windscreen.

As you can see, the pair “because of” is now modifying the verb “was frustrated,” so this sentence is correct now.

Use This Trick When in Doubt

One trick you can use is to substitute “due to” with “caused by.” If the substitution does not work, then you probably shouldn’t use “due to” there. For example:

My low grade was due to lack of study.
My low grade was caused by lack of study.

The substitution works, so “due to” is being used correctly. Here is another example:

I missed the class due to the rain.
I missed the class caused by the rain.

The substitution doesn’t work here, so “due to” shouldn’t be used there. The correct sentence would be:

I missed the class because of the rain.